Muni-Barney

When people under the age of 30 hear the name Barney, they think of an annoying purple dinosaur. Those beyond their 30s—no doubt the best 10-year run in the human lifespan—think of Barney as the bumbling deputy from Mayberry. While Don Knotts (R.I.P.), who played Barney Fife in the television sitcom, was one of the most underrated comic geniuses of his time, his on-screen name has been absconded by the common masses and used to describe every small town or suburban cop that every issued a ticket. Some of them deserve it. And it’s those we should be worried about, along with their over-zealous, Howard Sprague-like town council members and Mayor Pike look-a-likes when we think about municipal broadband. Big Brother is bad enough, but Little Brother is often worse. I belong to two organizations that 84% of the U.S. population would consider subversive. Do I think Barney and Howard won’t be watching that from their little firewalls in the courthouse? Oppression begins at home. The more local the control over our Internet usage, the more likely it will get abused. I wouldn’t want to have to move to Mount Pilot because the sheriff in Mayberry didn’t approve of my politics.