Christmas wish list

In the spirit of the season - and allowing myself to be politically incorrect and not so inclusive - I've compiled a Christmas wish list. I wish that:

Cable companies finally get their collective heads out of their posteriors and realize that many long-neglected residential customers would take phone service from anyone but their local phone companies.

Telcos finally get their collective heads out of their posteriors and realize there's a big residential video market waiting for the taking.

The public and private equity markets find that middle part of the pendulum after getting burned by business plans that had no business.

The public and private markets find that middle part of the pendulum after shutting out virtually all telecom-related companies from new funding.

Businesses with no real revenue or profit never again become more valued than companies that have been producing solid profits for years.

CEOs who get the ax for failing to execute their strategies don't get massive financial exit packages while those on the operational side of the house get the shaft.

Operational staffs continue to be the most sought-after personnel.

Regulators develop a comprehensive, fair plan that lets ISPs of all varieties access cable operators' networks and puts them on par with telcos.

The universal service fund is not gutted.

Carriers extend big fat bandwidth pipes to everyone at a price that doesn't force anyone to choose between food, medicine, shelter and Internet access service.

Application developers come up with cool things to do with all that bandwidth.

Content developers realize the Internet is not necessarily a threat to their traditional distribution channels.

AT&T is able to divide itself into as many units, groups and pieces as it deems necessary without sacrificing huge head counts.

Vendors stop hyping products that don't exist and won't for several years.

Vendors use standards committees to reach compromises that will move technology forward and not as a political pulpit.

The IP voice market doesn't succumb to its fascination with itself and implode.

The IP voice market begins to spawn logical applications that not only save carriers and customers cash but add real value to the network.

The FCC can come up with a logical plan for reserving spectrum for 3G wireless services that will put the U.S. at the same level of sophistication as Europe.

At least one of the wireless carriers that end up with 3G spectrum uses the bandwidth to provide a really fun gaming service.

The digital divide (however one defines it) gets a little smaller over the next year.

DSL providers rebound if only to provide some competition to large incumbents.

DSL providers continue working out the glitches that have prevented the technology from reaching a mass market.

At least a small minority of consumers will be able to walk into a local electronics store and buy a high-speed modem off the shelf.

Rural exchanges are not left to wither away in technological no man's land.

Small telcos continue to thrive.

Local telcos finally get their bundle, whatever it may be.

The "telecom downturn" actually becomes Darwinian, culling the herd of weak members and making the overall group stronger.